Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Snake Thighs: The Skin You're in When They're All Out of Pluck

Tank: Wet Seal
Cardigan: Kohl's
Skirt: H&M
Shoes: Penny Loves Kenny, DSW
Bag: Modcloth
Belt: Apt. 9, Kohl's
Sunglasses: Candie's, Kohl's

Tee: Arizona, J. C. Penney's
Skirt: Merona, Target
Shoes: Venus
Bag: Nine West, Marshalls
Belt: Wet Seal
Sunglasses: Michaels

Tank: J. C. Penney's
Dress: Modcloth
Shoes: Chinese Laundry, DSW
Bag: Call it Spring, J. C. Penney's
Sunglasses: J. C. Penney's

This week's post is a little sweet shop meets safari -- or maybe I should say sweet shop on safari.  I can just see a bunch of smiling ice cream sundaes, laughing lollipops, and ecstatic eclairs stuffed into a pink camo Jeep as they make their way through the Serengeti, snapping pics of the lions and zebras and hippos.  The hippos would love it, always being hungry and whatnot.  The hippos and the snakes, that is.

"Huh?  What snakes?" you're probably thinking.  "I thought this was a nice, cartoonish jungle (er, Serengeti), not the cobra-ridden kind on the Discovery channel."  (The bit about the hippos fixing to devour the tourist treats is neither here nor there.  Mostly because that allusion is based on a board game.)  

But snakes, it seems, are everywhere, especially where you least expect them.  For example, I recently discovered that one of my favorite pairs of Hue tights has a subtle snake pattern:

I was somewhat appalled -- I'd thought that the design was some kind of geometric -- because I hate snakes. In general because of their awfulness.  In particular because their slithery, legless bodies give me the creeps.  Gene of "Bob's Burgers" (which, incidentally, is a cartoon) agrees, setting his fear to song:

"I'm not afraid of ghosts
I'm not afraid of sharks
I'm not afraid of cancer
I'm just afraid of snakes!

They really freak me out
Where are their arms and legs?
It's not okay!"

No, Gene, it's not.  What could the good people at Hue have been thinking?  No woman wants to walk around on a couple of serpents, and "Hey, Lizard Legs!" is hardly a term of endearment.  Maybe it's a badge of badassness?  As in, I beat the skin off this critter and am now rocking it as an accessory.  A leg accessory.  Oh, the irony.

I see what you did there, Hue.

1 comment:

Jewel Divas Style said...

O.M.G Jem and The Holograms used to wear tights like that! the Zebra outfit looks great.