Friday, January 11, 2013

Book Report: I Hate Everyone . . . Starting with Me and Murder at the Academy Awards (both) by Joan Rivers


Joan Rivers is one crazy bitch.  Of course, as a "Fashion Police" devotee, I've always known this.  But it wasn't until I got between the pages of her latest book, I Hate Everyone . . . Starting with Me, that I realized the full extent of her relentlessly raucous wrath.  A polarizing figure if ever there was one, Rivers doesn't hold back, aiming her trademark snark at everyone from children to the elderly to voice the things that most of us are thinking but never say.  This doesn't mean that there aren't plenty of cringe-worthy, crossing-the-line passages.  But I decided to dismiss them, focusing instead on Rivers's take-no-prisoners tone and side-splitting humor.  Another reason I liked this book is that I frequently say that I "hate" things, even if to the tune of the fiance's mock-censorious, "Now, hate is a very strong word."  But like any self-respecting woman of extremes, I find it the best one with which to describe traffic, inclement weather, craft mishaps, unexpected prime time reruns, marred clothing, housework, slugs, technology, exercise, expired coupons, expired food, boring people, overbearing people, and people who hurt my feelings.  Needless to say, I gulped down Rivers's 242-page diatribe in a single sitting.

Her murder mystery, Murder at the Academy Awards, co-written by Jerrilyn Farmer, took two weeks longer to digest.  The best things about it are 1) the caricatures of Joan and her daughter Melissa on the cover, and 2) Rivers's snappy afterward, which was so amusing that it made me rethink my long-standing preference for fiction.  Still, despite this whodunit's slow start and boilerplate plot, it's fun to read because its stylish sleuth is Rivers's alter-ego, the fabulous and lunches-openly-with-her-plastic-surgeon Maxine Taylor.  Killers, paparazzi, and undercover rehab stints don't scare her, yet the sight of a slain starlet clad in a TJMaxx knockoff sends her screaming.

Her E! network cohorts would be proud.

1 comment:

Jewel Divas Style said...

Joan is crazy.

She was here in Aus about 5 years ago for our Logie awards (like the Globes) and she was given an honorary Logie made in pink. The threw it over her shoulder on stage and cracked stupid jokes. Way to offend Joan!