Archaeological Gig: Dino-Mite

 Fantastic Jurassic Charm Necklace

Tee: JCPenney

Skirt: Decree, JCPenney

Shoes: Ami Clubwear

Wristlet: City Streets, JCPenney

Royal Rings Necklace

Jacket: Marshalls

Tank: Express

Skirt: Delia's, Dolls Kill

Boots: Simply Vera, Kohl's

Wristlet: City Streets, JCPenney

Black Blossom Necklace

Jacket: Wild Fable, Target

Tee: Merona, Target

Skirt: Bongo, Sears

Shoes: Journeys

Bag: Harajuku Lovers, Ross

Belt: Marshalls

Prehistoric-themed pop culture has always been, well, popular.  In the '80s and '90s alone, there was Jurassic Park, The Land Before Time, and that weird claymationy sitcom Dinosaurs.  (Also Barney, but I don't want to mention him, at least not in the same breath as the others.  Partly because I think that the baby from Dinosaurs will eat him.  But mostly because he's awful.)  And why not?  Dinosaurs are awesome.  Scary, yes, but oh-so-skillful at capturing our imaginations.  (And also dinner.  But that's more to the point of the scary.)  My favorite dinosaur was always the gentle, plant-eating brontosaurus.  When I was little, my dad bought me a purplish-blue one from that pre-Walmart mecca of a general store known as Jamesway.   I guess that's why there are two brontos in my rag-tag band of reptilian dust collectors: 

The T-Rex is just there to lend street cred.

Recently, I found some dinosaur key chains, and I was just as happy as I was when I got that brontosaurus.  I knew that they were destined to migrate to The Tote Trove.  Because I've got a lot of unicorns, butterflies, etc., in my band of magnificently misfit jewelry, but ferocious things not so much.  So I was excited to add some bite to my brood.  Just as I was excited to unveil my newish Jetsons tee.  Now, for obvious reasons, I probably should've used some Flintstones apparel as the backdrop for Fantastic Jurassic.  I mean, Fred and Wilma have that dog named Dino, which is short for -- yes! -- dinosaur.  You know what?  Never mind.  I like the Jetsons tee better.  It's more ironic that way.

As for these other two outfits, they're for dinosaurs who are into raves and/or Sunday-movie-matinees-slash-mall crawls.  The rave seems like a velociraptor thing, whereas the movie and shopping spree spell stegosaurus. 

That said, there seems to be nothing left to say except this:

"Open the door, get on the floor, everybody kill the dinosaur."

You may notice that I went with the "kill" instead of "walk" lyric.  That's because dinosaurs are awesome only in museums and non-museum-quality collectibles.  People want guffaws, not claws and jaws.  Something nonthreatening that they can laugh at that won't laugh at (or dismember) them.

Clearly, that line's not from a catchy pop song.