Sugar Skull Bits and Halloween Fits

There are costumes, and then there are costumes.  When it comes to Halloween, the husband has always been more of a DIY than a costume-in-a-bag kind of guy.  So over the years for my parents' Halloween party, he's devised the following disguises:

- Guy Fieri & The Pioneer Woman (not implying they're a couple!)

- Bob Ross & his Happy Little Tree

- Johnny Atkins & Carla from The Goldbergs

- The Brawny Man & the Sparkles Fairy

- Mr. Clean & a '50s Housewife

  

But this year, the husband didn't have time to come up with something homegrown, so we went on Amazon and found these Day of the Dead getups.  Although we've never gone for something scary, I admit that these edgy and -- this part is very important -- not at all gory, dark side ensembles helped me get into the Halloween spirit.  On a lighter note, I loved the rainbow bows bisecting my ribcage.  

Hair comb and choker: Ella & Elly, Zulily

That said, here are my Halloween-themed "regular" outfits.  Or, in other words, my everyday costumes:

Bag: Betsey Johnson, Macy's

Belt: Marshalls

Silver Spider Necklace

Top: Wet Seal

Alien Admirer Barrette Brooch

Shoes: Betseyville, Macy's

Jelly bracelets: Target; Spike and orange bracelets: Amrita Singh, Zulily; Yellow bangles: B Fabulous; Black and white bracelet: Mixit, JCPenney; Ring: PinkBopp, Etsy; Skirt: Wild Fable, Target; Bag: Cat & Jack, Target

 

Tights: Isadora, Zulily

Skirt: Wild Fable, Target

Shoes: Sam Edelman, Kohl's

Fabulous Felt Halloween Candy Barrette

Jumbo Jack-O-Lantern Necklace (sold just before Halloween!)

Orange bangle: Mixit, JCPenney; Lime bangle and orange bangles: B Fabulous; Purple bracelet: Etsy

Top: Just Poly, Macy's

Lime top: SHEIN

And that's it!  Whatever your plans or apparel, make the most of this year's witching hour.  Have a very safe and happy Halloween! 🎃

Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, Silly Stories to Read in the Park

If you were a kid in the '80s or '90s, or had a kid in the '80s or '90s, or love Halloween or books, then you're probably familiar with Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark.  Distinguished by their starkly disturbing pen and ink covers, these story collections contained tales that were perhaps too psychologically sophisticated for the elementary schoolers who squabbled over them every Tuesday (library day).  My little sister was a fan, so I saw the battered paperbacks up close and personal even though they gave me (and, it turns out, her) the willies.  

If I hate these creepy classics, then why am I wasting copy on them?  To explain, I suppose, why I'm drawn to their antithesis: namely, cutesy, cozy Halloween mysteries.  In these stories, the only people who end up murdered are the ones who deserve it, the killers are always caught, and whatever charming small town that serves as the setting is restored to peace and unlimited candy.  In other words, they send a message that the world's a safe place as opposed to one that's out to get you -- or, at the very least, harboring paranormal scarecrows.   

Indeed, in Leslie Meier's Trick Or Treat Murder, the only thing scarier than an arsonist on the loose is retired librarian Miss Tilly's driving.  (Well, that and the week-old cupcakes that Lucy brings to the town Halloween party.  I get that she's a mom of four, but nothing puts the kibosh on a monster mash bash faster than past-its-prime pastry.)  An old-school gal of the highest order, Miss Tilly regards TV as "masturbation of the mind" and thrives upon enforcing Tinker Cove's stringent bylaws when it comes to paint colors.  So when she -- spoiler alert! -- almost kills a beloved local teen while behind the wheel of her vintage automobile, I couldn't help but despise her as much if not more than the at-large firebug.      

Yet even these gripes, ghastly as they are, aren't as troubling as those in Scary Stories.  Which means that I'd much rather take a walk in the park than a stroll through the cemetery.  

Especially if hell-on-wheels Tilly is taking a midnight spin past the headstones.

Retro Rainbow

Tee: SHEIN

Yellow bangle: Silver Linings, Ocean City; Orange and striped bangles: Mixit, JCPenney; Green bangle: B Fabulous: Rhinestone rings: Express: Chartreuse ring: Claire's; Bag: Betseyville, Boscov's

Sweater Vest: So, Kohl's

Orange Pineapple Necklace

Headband: Candie's, Kohl's

Boots: Betsey Johnson, Macy's

Skirt: So, Kohl's; Bag: Skinnydip London, Macy's; Boots: Simply Vera, Kohl's

Headband: Lady Arya, Zulily; Purple bracelet: Etsy; Black and white bracelet: Mixit, JCPenney; Striped bangle: Target; Braided bracelet: Amrita Singh, Zulily; Yellow bracelet: So, Kohl's; LEGO bracelet: Michelle's Charm World, Etsy; Rings: PinkBopp, Etsy

 

Pink Balloon Necklace

Sweater: So, Kohl's

Top: Vylette, Kohl's

Bag: Betsey Johnson, Dolls Kill

Dress: Live To Be Spoiled, Kohl's

Boots: Betsey Johnson, Macy's

Green and blue bracelets: Cloud Nine, Ocean City; Pink and rainbow bracelets: So, Kohl's; Ring: Charlotte Russe

Cocoon Boon Necklace

Bag: Nine West, Kohl's

Think Pink Necklace

Top: LC Lauren Conrad, Kohl's

Jeans: LC Lauren Conrad, Kohl's; Socks: Xhilaration, Target; Shoes: Mix No. 6, DSW

Snap clips: Gifted; Bejeweled rectangle barrette: SHEIN; Pink rectangle barrette: Zulily; Seashell barrette: I'm Your Present, Etsy; Sparkly pink bangle: Target; Pink stretch bracelet: Amrita Singh, Zulily; Other bangles: Mixit, JCPenney

I'll be the first to admit that "Retro Rainbow" is a lazy title, despite -- or perhaps because of -- it being one I could use for most of my posts.  As you know, hardly an entry goes up without me getting all flowery about something Technicolor or nostalgic or both.  But in the last ten or so years, I've never once featured a skort.  That's right, that strange combination of shorts and skirt last seen in the '90s is back.  I found this pink and purple plaid one at -- where else? -- Kohl's, in the juniors section, last July.    

At the time, it seemed so back to school, not at all right for beaches and BBQs (or a women who hasn't done homework since MySpace).  But I got it anyway, knowing it would be gone come September.  And then I blinked and it was October, and I was scrambling to squeeze it in before the first frost.  Yet such is fall and life -- and transitional wear.  

So revel in your rainbows as long as you can, whether they be vintage-inspired or otherwise.  Because you never know when the universe -- or Mark Zuckerberg -- will make you bust out your umbrella.      

Rock n' Roll Toll: The Grass is Never Cleaner

Once I started reading Lauren Weisberger's latest, Where The Grass Is Green And The Girls Are Pretty, I couldn't put it down.  The writing is smart, the plot is engrossing, and the characters are sympathetic.  Even when they've done something awful.  For this is one of those novels about privileged people behaving badly.  And the privileged people on, ahem, trial here are superstar anchorwoman Peyton Marcus and, to a lesser degree, her sister, stay-at-home mom Skye Alter.    

Despite their different lifestyles, the fortyish sisters are close, enjoying the kind of tongue-in-cheek repartee exclusive to those who've come from the same womb.  Indeed, the title's Guns N' Roses reference is about a concert the sisters snuck off to (they told their mom they were going to see James Taylor), reminding us that they're partners in crime.  And now Peyton lives in The Big Apple, whereas Skye's in a suburb called Paradise -- even though it's anything but.  Peyton and Skye may poke fun at each other and harbor their little jealousies.  Yet when it comes to the outside world, they remain a united front.  But that bond is brutally tested when Peyton and her husband are accused of breaking the law.

Now, as I mentioned, these sisters are pampered, making them targets.  Especially in terms of the following detour, which I've charmingly named, not target, but "tangent time."  

Where The Grass Is Green And The Girls Are Pretty perpetuates my least-favorite trope about feminine beauty, i.e., the Madonna/whore-like mindset dictating that all women are either 1) so pure that they don't care how they look or 2) so consumed by their appearance that it ruins their lives.  In this case, it's bohemian Skye who never wears makeup (but still looks gorgeous!) and ratings queen Peyton who subjects herself to Botox and chemical peels.  Surely, most women fall somewhere in the middle of this polarizing cosmetic spectrum (Lipstick?  Yes, please!  Needles?  Not if you paid me!).  Nevertheless, Weisberger is so skilled in her development of Peyton and Skye that they never come off as stereotypes.  Spoiled?  Sometimes.  One-dimensional?  Never.  I could tell because I cared what happened to them.

Still with me?  Good. Tangent time over!

Where The Grass Is Green And The Girls Are Pretty isn't as much about right and wrong as it is about relationships.  Sister-sister, husband-wife, and mother-daughter.  Peyton is the common denominator in all three, and as such is forced to reframe how she relates to her nearest and dearest.  And things get pretty ugly before she understands that it's not Emmys, country clubs, or prestigious schools, but authenticity with her loved ones that matters.

So.  If you like scandal and satire wrapped up in heart, then Where The Grass Is Green And The Girls Are Pretty is the sharp but fetching flamingo on your library's green -- but not too green -- front lawn.

When Life Gives You Autumn . . .

Boots: Penny Loves Kenny, Amazon

Top: LC Lauren Conrad, Kohl's

Bag: Betsey Johnson, Macy's; Brown bracelet: B Fabulous; Yellow bracelet: So, Kohl's; Cactus bracelet: The Tote Trove; Ring: Mixit, JCPenney; Skirt: Arizona Jeans, JCPenney; Tights: Isadora, Zulily

Necklaces: The Tote Trove

Bag: Betsey Johnson, Modcloth

Top: LC Lauren Conrad, Kohl's

Shoes: Wanted, Modcloth; Socks: Xhilaration, Target

Barrettes and necklace: The Tote Trove

Yellow bangles: B Fabulous; Blue bangle: So, Kohl's; Red bangle: XOXO, Ross; Maroon bangle: Iris Apfel for INC, Macy's

Skirt: Arizona Jeans, JCPenney

Tights: HUE, Amazon; Shoes: Chase & Chloe, Zulily

Cornucopia Barrette Brooch

Top: New York & Company

Bag: Betsey Johnson, Macy's; Barrette: Plymouth Plantation gift shop; Belt: Apt. 9, Kohl's; Barrettes: Goody, Target; Red and yellow bangles: B Fabulous; Orange bangle: Mixit, JCPenney

Skirt: Almost Famous, Kohl's

Granny Smith Slice Barrette Brooch

Top: New York & Company

Boots: Apt. 9, Kohl's; Bangles: B Fabulous; Ring: Making Waves, Ocean City; Bag: T-Shirt & Jeans, Zulily

Cardigan: LC Lauren Conrad, Kohl's

Socks: Amazon; Shoes: Chase & Chloe, Zulily

Two-tone bangle: Iris Apfel for INC, Macy's; Ring: Express; Bag: T-Shirt & Jeans, Amazon, Top: LC Lauren Conrad, Kohl's; Skirt: Almost Famous, Kohl's

. . . make lemonade.  Or, more seasonally speaking, lemonade apple cider.  If that's even a thing.  But there's the beer-lemonade hybrid shandy, so why not?  All of this is an elaborate build-up to state a simple truth: I still have unworn lemon-print stuff left over from summer.  So I styled it with fall favorites such as plaid, boots, . . . and my new Granny Smith Slice and Cornucopia Barrette Brooches.  Because nothing says harvest like obnoxiously large accessories -- or a kilt garnished with gourds.  

It's what the Pilgrims would've wanted.  And by Pilgrims I mean the insidious yet elegant lantern fly:

At least that invasive species knows how to make a fashion statement.